As we moved from March to April, we were made aware that he added to his impressive tattoo collection with another winner: interlocking zodiac signs. Kindly keep in mind that at this time he very much has an order of domestic protection filed against him to protect her. What did he do? Took to his TikTok (that I never knew about) to share how proud he was.
It's difficult to tell in the picture, but the hidden word is "Bae". So his caption is "New tattoo, me and my bae's sign". Not sure about the rest of y'all, but I cannot say the word "bae" and take myself seriously. Although, that may be why my circle of friends does not include teenagers. This man is turning 50 years old this year.
April 3 was our first court hearing, and it was to establish my emergency support. It had been a month since we filed. My mom drove down and joined our cousin and good friend and we met my attorney at the court house. Understandably nervous, I stayed focused on my support crew and made small talk. The doors opened, and we were all permitted to go inside the courtroom. He arrived shortly after and looked nothing like the man I had known for so long, and with darker hair. We were all honestly hoping he would be arrested while we were there, as we had confirmation that the girls' families had reported all of his actions to the police and an arrest warrant was issued. Sadly, we didn't get to witness that. He requested that my support system leave the courtroom prior to us beginning. I had hopes for an understanding judge, and while she acknowledged how disgusting, manipulative, and reprehensible his behavior was, she then told us she couldn't make a ruling that day for my support after his attorney conveniently shared that he had filed for bankruptcy. For anyone curious, child support is protected in bankruptcy filings (as in, the person filing is still responsible for carrying out those payments), but clearly no financial aid would be coming my way anytime soon.
The judge moved to the "more important" topic of awarding visitation. I declined the offers of his family members as chaperones for supervised visits (how can I trust anyone at this point, much less from his side of the family? I easily envisioned them facilitating him leaving with my kids; after all, I hadn't heard from any of them since everything happened), but agreed to the county family center. He would also begin having FaceTime calls with them a few times a week. I felt a lump in my throat at the thought of dropping my kids off at a court-appointed center because of his offensively disgusting actions. I would be handing off my baby to a stranger to spend quality time with the man who avoided coming to see her for over two weeks when we were concerned for her very survival and had yet to attend a single medical appointment since her birth? Sure, this sounds like fun. Oh - and I still have no way to provide for myself or my children? Very cool. Thanks, justice.
The next day, he had his hearing for the girls' protection orders. The moms said he arrived, sat smugly in his chair, and would audibly laugh at some of the claims. The orders of protection remained, and as he exited the courtroom, he was handcuffed & booked for his violation of a domestic violation protection order. While it didn't immediately solve any of my problems, it did feel like a small win.
The business partner bailed him out less than twelve hours later. The smirk on his face at his release mugshot was the creepiest thing I had seen in a while...that says a lot given all of the material I had as of late.
Never been more ready to be thankful for a risen Savior than I was the next weekend. Easter Bunny visit, our home church, and a lunch and egg hunt for the kids with a group of good friends was exactly the kind of comfort bubble I needed to be in for a day.
Getting to watch our kids, some of whom had been playing together since they were barely walking, running through the wide open spaces of my friends' beautiful property on Easter Sunday gave me a moment of restoration for which I will be forever grateful.
After Easter, my mother-in-law reached out. She had finally heard that I filed because my stepson had to tell her. She hadn't heard from her son in several weeks, and she said he was always short with her. She was sorry about what happened (she didn't actually know that much of the story) and said she thought he had changed. She confirmed the infidelity in his first marriage and shared the story of picking up his ex-wife and driving around with her trying to track down the other woman.
I began trying to Google "side hustles", which of course sent my social media ads into a tailspin. I would lay there at night, unable to sleep, and screenshot ads that would pop up for how to make a side income when working full time/mom to young kids/(soon-to-be) single mom/etc. How is this ever going to work? Will it work? Will I have to sell the studio? Do I have to move home with my mom? How did this happen? How is this actually happening? And on it would spiral. Thank goodness for this sweet girl. I still had her sleeping in my bedroom. Ever since she was born, it was so often just the two of us at night. I wasn't ready to move her yet. I figured we would have to move before long anyway, so why disrupt her surroundings twice? Also, selfishly, looking over at her when I would feel overwhelmed was so grounding, calming, reassuring. She was content. She was peaceful. I still don't know if we'll be ok, but for now all I can do is trust in Him. After all, he sent me this gal when I least expected it.
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